8 important lessons I learned from owning my own search engine – Lesson 5 of 8Mashcor
Lesson 5 is my favorite lesson: Solving my relationship with myself!
Many of us adults walk around in a fog or haze day in and day out and we don’t even know it.
We have so many layered perceptions and associations built up regarding how we feel about everything in life including ourselves. We fail to do a perception audit about how we really feel about ourselves as human beings.
It is called self-reflection and no it’s not the time for a quick selfie.
There are times and places for a selfie and there are times and places for self-reflection. It boggles the mind that people, including myself, do not know when those times are upon us.
When I was in the early phases of building Mashcor I was faced with choices that conflicted with my conscience and my beliefs. Do I disclose to this client the perils they might be facing and lose the sale or do I motor on and make money anyway?
I had to realize that being an entrepreneur is less about making money and more about giving service to your fellow man. I had to stop chasing money and build something that might not make me a single red cent.
I did not lose my mind completely but I did sleep better at night knowing what I was put on Earth to do. Even though I had a fulfilling day job I felt that I could change the world in a meaningful way and leave something behind after I am gone.
The hard part about lesson 5 is getting to grips with the aspects of your personality that are not good at all. The part of you that can become snarky, sarcastic, aggressive, impatient and unpleasant. This is not only to other people but it is to yourself and your self-image.
In our incredibly narcissistic society today, we have a really hard time dealing with a genuine healthy self-image in a calm and peaceful way.
We get that aspect drilled out of all of us by that horrible phase called puberty which let me remind you was only 10 years.
That is why most people carry the scars of High School throughout their lives much more than primary school or tertiary levels. It is a period where self-image is crystallized. Most of the time it is incorrectly aligned and it plays havoc with how your life develops from then on.
In primary school you really couldn’t care about your image and at tertiary level, you were already “damaged”.
When I started on my journey as an entrepreneur I had to ask myself, WHY?
Why did I wish to take on so much risk?
What was missing from my life that compelled me to fill the void?
When will enough be enough?
Most of the answers to these questions had to do with how I felt about myself. I was the youngest at my high school so I couldn’t mature at a leisure pace. I had to squash my emotions because I was afraid to appear childish in front of my older classmates.
Would I have started school earlier if I knew what I know now? Not on your life. My life evolved pretty much as it should have.
And that brings me back to lesson 5, and why it was such a fun lesson for me to learn.
In lesson 5, I found permission to fail!
I found a forgiving, loving, patient and long-neglected teenager who was suppressed by life and me. I asked for his forgiveness and he said there was none to give.
I simply had to learn to accept my life and myself for the nice and happy guy that I am. That is how I approach my day job, Mashcor and my life.
I will end the lesson there not because it is short but because you need to do your own self-reflection.
Go for it, it may not start out nice but you come out the other end much lighter on yourself and possibly on your feet.